Monthly Archives

October 2015

Lifestyle, My Life, Observations

Beyond Reasonable Doubt…

As soon I was legally able to get a job I went for it – I was fifteen. With a one page resume that only really had my name, address and school grades I put my best foot forward to potential employers – who now that I think of it would have loved some cheap labour. I accepted the fact that my limited work experience meant I would start from the bottom.  This didn’t worry me because it has always been important for me to be Miss independent, Miss self-sufficient – thats my mantra.

Reality is setting in. I am now days away from finishing up my full time job and morphing into a lady of leisure whilst I await the arrival of our little princess. Being a lady of pleasure is some what scary to me – what will I do with myself? I am not good at relaxing, you know doing nothing. Women around me have been encouraging me to enjoy the nesting time.

At the same time its is also very exciting. I will be temporarily unemployed, going were the wind takes me and my bub. Mixed emotions, I know.

Women who have been in my “swollen feet” state say to me it will be the last time I will enjoy gallivanting, lounging, shopping, sleeping, let along peeing alone – for a little while.

I am writing this post because I wanted to share a recent experience with you. To give some context to the conversation, in Australia when you have a baby you are provided with parental leave pay for roughly about six months. In order to receive the payment you need to go to a government agency to sign up.

Monday morning, I made the decision to be at the government agency bright and early so that I could head to the office straight after. I waited in line so that I could check in ready to see the Customer Service Officer (CSO). This was the first time that I had ever entered such a government agency that is renowned for providing income benefits for individuals who are down and out or going a rough patch. I was greeted by a man who whilst friendly enough appeared slightly odd. Our conversation transcript is shown below

CSO – How can I help you today?

IamTinashe – I am here to register myself for the paid parental leave initiative.

CSO – What is your government registry number?

IamTinashe – I don’t have one…

The CSO looks up from the screen, blinks twice and asks

CSO – Are you sure?

I was a little taken aback but responded with a firm

IamTinashe  – Yes

CSO – What is your date of birth, first and last name?

Interested to see where this was going I provide him with my details. He proceeds go input them into the system. In complete shock he looks up and says..

CSO – My gosh! Your over 30 and you have never been on any benefits! Have a seat someone will be right with you. 

I didn’t say anything just simply walked away and proceeded to sit down. A lot of thoughts were going through my mind. The main one was – stereotype much? So because I am a African pregnant woman signing up for paid parental leave – surely this can’t be the first time that I had received government benefits.

….right.

Its times like this that my race is highlighted or stereotypes apply. I see it, but I refuse to let it bother me. Infact it fuels me. I know what they are probably expecting based on their own prejudices – but I am ready, willing and eager to exceed their expectations.

You know, really blow their minds.

…drops mic walks off the stage.

Dress – ASOS, Shoes – Wittner

 

Fashion, Maternity, My Life

Not Complicated, Its Simple…

If you ever had a conversation with me before I was pregnant I would often say comments like, “if you are comfortable then its not fashion“. I love fashion – live and breath it but of late I have had a temporary 180 degree shift on my views. You see my last weeks of my pregnancy have humbled me and forced me to resist the urge to buy more maternity wear and really just focus on comfort.

Which brings me to the outfit you see before you today – yes I have given in to leggings. Truth is I have always had a love and hate relationship with leggings.

I think they are appropriate for the gym, long international flights and lounging at home  – but highly inappropriate as a fashion staple – you know when you are mingling with the general public in social setting.

Why? Well the thin material for starters can be pretty unforgiving if you want the brutal truth. No one and I mean no one wants to see your undergarments when you bend over to pick up something from the ground.

If you are wearing them daily just because, I am sorry to say this to you but you have been defeated. Yes I said it. You are admitting to yourself and others around you – that you just don’t know how to dress any more.

Sounds harsh I know, but I am just being real. Apparently people you considered to be friends didn’t have the heart to tell you the honest truth.

Disclaimer: Unless of course of are pregnant. That is the only time that you have an endless supply of  “get out of leggings jail free card’ – consider them a safety blanket. Double standards, I know.

What I will say if you are ever in a situation were you are forced – at gunpoint – to wear leggings, just make sure your top covers your front and back lady parts. Modesty is vital.

Knit Top – Country Road, Maternity Leggings – ASOS, Boots – Wittner

Maternity, Sisterhood

We Are Not Lucky We Are Blessed…

Looking at the photos above its hard to believe that its been over a month since I had my very first baby shower.

Whilst it seemed like an impossible task with 80 guests confirming their attendance – some very special people lent a helping hand and were able to make it all come together with grace and style.

Hormones can be quite a trip when you are pregnant, on the day of the baby shower i was really tired to begin with but its more so the homes that contributed to the sense of feeling overwhelmed by the love and support from these phenomenal women.

Picture this women from Brisbane, Canberra, Melbourne, Sydney and New Zealand gathered to celebrate with me. They came not only to shower us with gifts but to also share their words of wisdom. Schooling me on what it means to be a mother and a wife. How one can balance the two so that neither party ever felt abandoned etc etc.

It was deep. A real out of body experience – like is this really happening? Its in this moment that I realised I was now officially entering womanhood. It made me question a lot of what i had been doing all this time. With motherhood was this going be the emancipation of IamTinashe?

I have a real thirst for knowledge so I took it all in. It may all not meant a whole lot to me at the time, but with more experience and exposure to the subject matters they touched on I am sure it will be a great point of reference.

Deep breaths. Inhale through the nose. Exhale out the nose. Why? Its a lot. But I am ready to embrace the challenge head-on.

I couldn’t sign out from this post without thanking those that supported the process and those that showed their support -you know who you are. I thank you. Put simply you could have been been anywhere in the world, but your there with me – I appreciate that.

I will single our one person, my mother. I wanted to give a heartfelt thank you to my mum. I guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. This woman couldn’t stop, she wouldn’t stop. For weeks we had  teleconferences, exchanged emails and messages just so we could make the baby shower vision come to life. I know you are beside yourself with excitement with the arrival of your first grandchild. So mama thank you for your time, patience and hard work, all these wonderful memories would not have been possible without you.

Earrings, Necklace and Bracelet – Lovisa, Leopard Print Dress – Witchery – Nude Pumps – Wittner.

Fashion, My Life, Observations

You Don’t Want To Catch A Brick…

When you see me with my hair up it means one of two things.

One: I am busy, completely booked and have no time to have my hair down or rubbing against my back.

Two: I have had my hairstyle for a few weeks and I am getting over it. Craving something new.

Even though I did the big chop and am going through the natural hair journey, blah blah blah….yawn.

Lord knows I love to have my hair braided. It reduces the time it takes for me leave the house.

The only drawback to having your hair braided is removing the braids – I hate that. Hate is a strong word, but I truly mean it in this context.

In a true act of desperation I sent the following to my friends:

Dear cherished friends,

You are cordially invited to attend my braid removal party.

When – anytime that YOU are available

Where – Canberra, Australia

As part of the braid removal celebrations entertainment, dinner and drinks will be provided. 

Please RSVP at your earliest convenience.

IamTinashe

Days passed and no one responded. I thought to myself, “what is wrong with these people?”. We even exchanged many other texts but no one brought up the ‘braid hair removal party”. The height of rudeness.

Before I convinced myself to shave my hair once more or spiralled into a pity party for one, I thought to myself if I had received the above invite what would I do? Well for starters I would think the heffer who sent the invite was mad. Although I would definitely not attend, I would still send a response along the lines of ‘hell to the NO!”.

Awkwardly, I did follow up with the invitees – couldn’t help myself  – they all thought I was joking and the message didn’t need a response. The lies they tell!

Long story short I will be spending the weekend undoing my hair, by my damn self – maybe the people invited will read this post, feel pity for me and drag their bum to my house and come help me.

…some wishful thinking.

Nerd Glasses – SportsGirl, Stripe Dress – Target, Leopard Boots – Witchery

Fashion, Maternity Advice, My Life

Not Excusable, But Plausible…..

My sincere apologies for the lack of posts. It’s hard to believe that we are getting closer and closer to meeting our baby girl – were has the time gone?

Let me just say, when it comes to blogging my heart wants to, but after a long day in the office my body just isn’t a willing participant. All my body wants to do is vege out in front of the TV so I can watch mind numbing reality and ratchet TV shows.

As for my mind? Well think it’s safe to say that baby brain is real.

You see before I was pregnant I used to think “baby brain” was a load of absolute rubbish – an excuse used by pregnant women to get away with ridiculous behaviour. Harsh, I know.

You would be pleased to know that this point of view has now changed. Having personally experienced “baby brain” myself, I am a lot more sympathetic and understanding.

Some examples of my baby brain episodes include but are not limited to:

Exhibit A:

After a grocery shopping trip I unpacked the goods, but some how misplaced my debit credit card. I turned the house upside down looking for the card. A couple of days later when I was just about to call the bank to cancel the card, my mother called me and said that she was cleaning out the freezer and found my debt credit card in the freezer.

Exhibit B:

The wind has been quite harsh in Canberra making my lips drier than the Sahara desert. To fix the problem, I decided to go to a local drug store to pick up some moisturising lip balm for my lips. Seems simple right? Wrong. I stood in the lip gloss aisle for about 20 minutes trying to decide which Chapstick was best for my dried lips. For the life of me I could not decide. In the end I decided to purchase four as I just could not make a decision. Much to my frustration I walked away with a cherry, watermelon, raspberry and strawberry moisturising lip balm. You can imagine at this point I just wanted out of the drug store.

Exhibit C:

By far the most dangerous I thing I have done during my baby brain period is arrive home from work, insert my key into the lock, unlock and open the apartment door, walk into apartment, carry out my night time routine and  fall asleep – all whilst my house keys are still in the lock on the other side. To my horror hubby found them the next morning  when he was heading out to work. Baby brain could have put us in a compromising position.

The “baby brain” evidence is slowly mounting again me. Lets just say hubby is keeping a close eye on me as my pregnancy advances.

Hat– Top Shop, Dress – Temt, Pumps – Wittner