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December 2016

Style

Wake. Pray. Slay

Twinkle Twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are… I have that bloody nursery rhyme going round and round in my head. It’s like the song is on repeat, playing over and over. Kill me now!

It is just after 10pm and baby-girl and husbae are fast asleep – exhausted from daycare and work respectively.

This is probably going to be the only time that I will have to myself to put my thoughts in writing. Even though I am tired as, I want to take this opportunity to just write. It’s vital.

Firstly, can we just ask ourselves – where has the year gone? We’re already staring at Christmas dead in the eye and the New Year is just around the corner. It feels like I blinked and 2016 is gone – a true sign of ageing. Naturally, like you, I have been reflecting on 2016. How has your year been?

Imagine we are all checking for 2017 and 2016 S comes out – some Apple humor there.

2016 was unique for me, because I spent the first half of the year being a stay at home mother and the second half of the year as a working mother. Two equally challenging jobs, but both so different. Looking back, I am tremendously proud that I managed to make the transition. Of course, I didn’t do it all on my own – I had a lot of help from my support network which I will forever be grateful for.

It hasn’t always been easy. The struggle of getting a routine together and sticking to it, making sound business decisions on very limited sleep, and consuming copious amounts of coffee.

In order for the transition to work, some things had to change. We had to modify our behavior, routine and adapt to the changing situation. It was necessary.

To put this blog post into context I went back to work after 9 months at home with our gorgeous little girl. Thankfully, there wasn’t any financial pressure so I could have stayed at home longer (in fact husbae encouraged it) but I was itching to get back to work. Again, I know how lucky I was. I had the choice to return to work when I was ready – this is not the reality for a lot of women/couples out there.

After being a stay at home mother, the task of returning back to work full time can seem a little daunting. You know you can do it but for some reason you still have doubts. It is at times like these that those naysayers have a platform to basically judge you for returning to the workforce – “What is the rush? The baby needs her mother! It’s just too soon”.

With hormones swirling through my body, these comments shook me. They upset me because part of me thought maybe I was running away from being a mother, or selfishly honoring my career goals – or worse, both. Thoughts like these made me lose balance for a moment, but I quickly regrouped. I kept my end goal in mind: to be the best role model I could be for our little girl and lead by example. Each day she sees me (frantically) armor up and get ready for another working day, and hopefully by seeing this from a young age she too will value independence, perseverance, having a strong work ethic, and doing something you love.

Below I share the reasons why I think it is important to head back to work after having a baby:

  • Remember, You Had A Purpose Before You Had A Baby – I found this quote by Michele Borba interesting, “if a child is a woman’s only goal, everyone suffers, including the child.” Not to mention the thousands of dollars you invested in your career (university, TAFE etc.) and the endless hours you spent mastering your chosen profession. Just like that, are you prepared to let it go?
  • Financial Freedom – In some marriages a spouse may die at a young age, lose their ability to earn money through an injury or illness, or worse still, just get an upgrade and leave for someone else. Now, if you are not working and generating some kind of income, where does that leave you?
  • Variety Is the Spice Of Life – I remember when I was a stay at home mum. After about 5 months I literally felt like the four walls were closing in on me. I was doing the same thing over and over and even though I tried to make time to watch the news every day, I found my conversation topic range became smaller and smaller. I missed work because being at work gave me so much exposure to people from all walks of life, cultural backgrounds, sexual orientation and, hell, tax brackets etc. All which makes for a more enriching experience and exciting stories to share with your partner! Juicy.
  • Relationship Goals – When you are at home all the time, you may become a little bit nutty. For instance, you might obsess over a used glass (without a coaster) on the dining table that hasn’t been placed in the dishwasher. How does one just drink a beverage and leave the empty cup there? I am just going to leave it there. Day 4 the glass is still there. Wage war until the white flag is raised. They will surrender and place the cup in the dishwasher!

You see what I mean? Madness.

Having a focus outside of your home will make you appreciate each other just like when you first met and, as a bonus, you can carry the financial load together.

Now, I know this blog post may be polarizing and that I may hear from women who are happily stay at home mothers who may not necessarily agree with what I am saying. With that in mind, I want to be clear on one thing. Even though I talk about reasons why I think you should go back to work after a baby, there is no “one timeframe fits all” when it comes to going back to work. There is no one right way to rejoin the workforce either.

You, as a mother and as a woman, will make the decision about when or even IF you will go back to work.

Why?

As Bobby Brown once said, it’s your prerogative.

Dress – McFayden Trends, Belt – Country Road, Strappy Heels – Target

Guest Blogger

Guest Blogger – Chrissy Z

 

I created this website so I could document my wears and my opinions.

Variety is the spice of life as they say – so its always exciting for me to have a guest blogger. Why? They share heart warming stories that leave you feeling like you have known them for ages.

With that I would like to introduce you to Chrissy – a woman who marches to her own beat and rocks platinum hair reminiscent of EVE way back in the Ruff Ryders days.

Who are you? Chrissy Z

Age? Twenty Something

Location? Sydney, Australia 

Profession? Hairdresser 

What is your favourite hairstyle? Being a hairdresser it’s easy to change my hairstyles whenever I want, but my absolute favourite was my short blonde natural hair. I got to play with creating different shapes and tones. It was a lot of fun. 

How would you describe your personal style? I hate conforming to a specific style because I’m always open to stepping out of my comfort zone and switching up my looks. I have so many different pieces in my wardrobe and I love mixing and matching different pieces to create unique outfits with some of the same pieces. I can’t say that I choose to adopt a specific versatile style, because I’m naturally attracted to various looks and concepts.

What is your go to fashion outfit? A classic pair of jeans paired with a statement top, and a pair of ankle boots or sneakers. Being a mum on the go I need to be comfortable. 

What are your must have items in your wardrobe? I need my black staples, such as black jeans, black dress, black pants. These items are always a perfect starting point to any outfit. 

What inspires your style? I grew up in East London where people are very expressive with their clothes and individuals who are daring and creative have always inspired me. Also, growing up, the women in my family have always had fun with their style. Anything that is not my norm has always intrigued me, so I find myself purchasing international fashion magazines and following bloggers from countries I have no connection to. 

5 things about you that the world should know about you?

  1. I love learning new cultures and languages;
  2. Before I was a hairdresser I was an accountant;
  3. I love to cook! If I had to quit hairdressing my next career would be a Chef;
  4. I am an adrenaline junkie, bungee jumping, sky diving – you name, it I will do it!
  5. I love reading Shona novels.

What is your relationship Iike with your body? Growing up I was always comfortable with my body, absolutely loved it. After having my daughter I had to fall in love with body all over again. I was a size 6 before and I became a size 16 after. I didn’t want to be that size as I felt really unhealthy. I worked hard to get down to my size now which is a 10. I struggled and it took me a while to get to a place where I can say my body changed because of this precious little human it created. How can you absolutely hate your body for doing something so magical that gifted you with a beautiful child. Also, having a daughter has made me very careful as to how I speak about my body in front of her because I don’t want her to feel insecure about her body from watching me not loving my own. 

Do you like your body? Every stretch mark, every weird toe, my saggy boobs, MY imperfect body – I love every inch of it. 

If anything what would you change about your body? The only thing I want to change about my body is to be fitter and stronger. 

What is your guilty pleasure? Chocolate anything! I have a major sweet tooth!

Special thanks to Chrissy for giving us an insight to her life. When we were talking about this blog post she said that she had never featured on a website. She did a fantastic job of staying true to herself and sharing the real real.

Are you the next guest blogger on IamTinashe.com? I would love to hear from you, email me if you are interested.

Love and light.

IamTinashe

She Tried It

Fresh Nude Foundation

It gets really hot here in Australia, so during summer you really have to be light on with your foundation application and coverage, otherwise you will end up with mountains for pimples – no matter how good your skin care routine and water intake is.

Lighter foundation application in summer makes sense, because the whole idea of wearing everyday makeup is to enhance your natural features – not to apply layers upon layers of makeup which make you unrecognisable to your family, friends and work colleagues.

You know I was thinking about this earlier – close your eyes for moment and flashback to, say, ten years ago. Its almost hard to believe now but finding a foundation that suited my brown skin was virtually impossible. More often than not, I would end up with a foundation that looked like it blended with my skin colour – under the beauty counter lights that is- but dare to walk outside and I would look like I had decided to wear baby powder on my face, you know, for that clown effect. Think Heath Ledger as the joker in the Batman movie.

Now open your eyes. You are now in the present day. Finally people in the beauty industry are starting to accept that women of colour want to look beautiful (we have disposable cash) and have introduced great products that suit our skin tones.

In the past, i would never in a million years have thought of buying foundation from The Body Shop. I would have just keep it moving because I knew there were no foundations on offer for a lady of my colour. That is, until now.

Like any makeup junkie, i am always on the lookout for hot new products to try out. I came across the “Fresh Nude Foundation” via YouTube. Pretty much every beauty blogger that i love and trust was raving about it. I watched about four or five videos and rolled my eyes because to me it seemed like they were being paid to say nice things about the product.

Curiosity got the better of me and I decided to take a chance  – what the hell, it’s only $AU 37.95. I work. Let me try it out.

I purchased colour Caribbean Mahogany, as it was a dead match to my skin tone. Look, I don’t want to be getting any hate mail – so if you get a foundation and it’s not the right shade, you can also purchase these fantastic Shade Adjusting Drops – to transform an ‘almost right’ shade to you right shade in just one drop.

fnf_caribbeanmahogany_075

I have been using this foundation religiously for six weeks straight and it’s only now that I can give a straight up review on the foundation.

PROS:

  • You get to see a slightly enhanced version of your natural self. No filter.
  • The price point – cheapest all round foundation I have ever purchased. I like buying things that don’t make you feel like you are being extorted.
  • The foundation smells amazing – it’s like you’re applying the scent of a high-end florist on your face.
  • When applying the foundation after a primer it blends perfectly with my skin tone and lasts the day at work or play.

CONS:

  • Don’t try to wear layers of this foundation – you will look cakey and your skin will become hella oily. Experimentation led me to this discovery.
  • Not everyone will find a colour that will match their skin tone and will have to spend more of their hard earned cash to purchase the shade adjusting drops.
  • More is more – for what you pay it would be nice to have more of the product.

Look I really liked this foundation – it was such a positive surprise! So much so, that this foundation has been inducted into the holy grail of my makeup arsenal.

This isn’t a paid post just a customer who is happy with her purchase. If you get a chance do yourself a favour and try this foundation. You can thank me later…

IamTinashe