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June 2017

Guest Blogger

How To Spot “Mr. Waste Your Time”.

I felt the anger build up in me as I drove, the devilish thoughts that were going through my head made me think I was going crazy. The thought of pulling up at a sports shop and purchasing a baseball bat crossed mind – it might help me with the ultimate revenge. Yes, I was very angry, but this hasn’t only happened to me. At the age of 32, I feel there are many other women that have experienced this level of anger and the feeling of betrayal in the dating world. Today, I sit here writing this article and thinking one thing – how did I miss the signs? I was dating a “Mr Waste Your Time”. Mr Waste Your Time exists in every culture, draped in gold and sugar coated in everything you’ve ever wanted.

Ladies – when you are dating, what do look for in a man? I ask myself this question every time I go on my first date and now, after so many first dates, I somehow still find myself being attracted – dating even guys I can only describe as, Mr Waste Your Time.

That being said, here are my top ten characteristics you will find in”Mr Waste Your Time:

  1. At the beginning, they say everything you want to hear – sweet nothings. The relationship starts off with constant praise and him telling you everything that’s perfect about you, then once he thinks he has you hooked he will change just like that!
  2. They will lie about their past relationships. They will tell you something like “my wife and I are separated, we have been separated for a while now” or “I’m 34 and I haven’t had many girlfriends”.  Lies, lies, lies.
  3. They won’t commit to a future with you, let alone talk about it. I.e They make every excuse to fight with you about planning future or committing to plans.
  4. Constantly begging for nude photographs or any form of sexual activity. They have so many girls on the go and still want you to “send nudes”, while they are getting sex on the side.
  5. They never want to be seen in public with you. He doesn’t want you to be seen by his other chick, (wife even) or friends.
  6. They try to seclude you from family and friends. He’ll make excuses about how your family members are judging him and it should be just the two of you.
  7. They won’t introduce you to their friends. His friends may give away his little charade he has going on so he won’t bother introducing you.
  8. They manipulate every situation to benefit themselves. You’ll often hear “your friends weren’t nice to me, so I don’t think we should hang out” when your friends only ask the right questions and he is intimidated by them.
  9. They never post any pictures of the two of you on social media. He’s afraid that his other chick/wife will see them
  10. They make up excuses for why they don’t use certain age appropriate social media platforms. He’s likely hiding his current or previous relationships that haven’t ended.

Ladies, in my humble opinion, those are the top 10 signs that you have just met/started dating “Mr Waste Your Time”. The actions of a man will tell you he is really into you. Should he become hot and then cold or the consistency in calls, texts or even time spent together changes – don’t waste your time or settle for second best. A guy who is really into you will do everything in his power to get and keep you.

You can find Ms Tinashe Fay on Instagram dropping knowledge regularly.

Thank you, Tinashe Fay, for your honest and open account – your message should assist those active in the dating world right now.

My Life

What’s Going On?


Just like that we find ourselves in the middle of the year. Anyone else feel like they blinked and they jumped from January to mid-2017?


As I write this our toddler is taking her nap, husbae is on the computer working, and I am lounging on the couch, typing this blog post from my iPhone.

I was looking over my blog site and realized that I hadn’t been giving this area of my life some love – so let’s fix that right now. Let me give you a run down on what has been happening.

Hair:
Natural hair in corporate Australia is still a rarity, with many professional women choosing straight hairstyles achieved using wigs or weaves. I’ve always been someone that marches to their own beat – so for the month of May I wore my hair in Havana twists. I have worn this hairstyle countless times, but if I am honest, this time around I really wasn’t feeling it. No matter how many YouTube videos I watched I couldn’t inspire myself to really rock the hair. It weighed me down – maybe even changing the way I felt and acted. It was weird, I just could not shake the feeling. This month I am going to opt for something low key and easy.

Clothes:
If you watch my Instagram videos you know that I have been putting in work to get back in shape. This hard work has slowly slowly been paying off and I have found myself fitting into some of my pre – mommy clothes. Examples of last months highlights below:


Fitness:
Last month I purchased a Fitbit and you know what –  I have not looked back. It honestly has been one of  the best decisions ever. We have created a group of 8 women and it’s game on all day, every day. Each day I literally give it my all just so that I can hopefully be crowned the winner at the end of the week. But it’s hard – these people do not let up!  My competitive streak keeps pushing me harder so I am hitting targets and shredding some of this baby fat. No more looking at the scales on the verge of tears.


There you have it, a summary of the last month!

Of course, I am still busy juggling being a wife, mother, working professional and a woman who still wants a social life. The only way I survive and accomplish it all is by living in the moment and giving my all to each task that I set myself.

How are you doing?

IamTinashe